Dear Discouraged,
Dear Discouraged - we examined your e-mail during our recent retreat and several members of Christians Under the Stairs wrote the following responses. One person advised that she had gone through a similar situation so you are not alone in facing these things. She did not wish to be published but did state she handled the matter by speaking to the people privately at a later date and by realizing that the people have a right to make their decisions and, if they don't come … they are just missing out on a good time. You wanted to hear directly from our youth members so here are their responses ....
It's different for us here because our meetings are on Sunday. But just because they complain and discourage the youth group to others doesn’t mean they are completely disbelieving Christians. They still attend, showing that they still care. Accepting religion being a big part of your life comes with maturity and they will soon learn that. :) Ariel, 17
Don’t worry. If you have other friends in the group that you can depend on, then you should stay. I once belonged to a youth group where the kids were really rude. I left and my friends recommended another group. I am still in it and the people are like my family. We’re tight like Spandex. You should decide if they are your friends or not. If they are, stay. If they are not, find another place you’ll like. Vicky, 15.
It’s their choice to make fun of something that they are involved in. Don’t worry about them; just ignore them, Chantel, 13.
Hey, it's natural to feel betrayed when people you care about don't seem to find importance in the same things you do. It is still possible to remain friends with these two and perhaps you should bring your discouragement to them. If they are truly your friends, they will listen. If they choose to ignore your feelings, then perhaps you should seek other friends within your youth group. You should try to talk to the people in your group about the discussion to see who truly cares, You should try to chill with those who care about the things you care about. Stephen, 19
I can honestly say that nothing like that has happened to me. Although on "bring a friend" night the first year I joined, I didn't ask my friends because I was afraid that something would happen to me. However, to my surprise when I asked the next year, they were interested. I think you shouldn’t worry about them and I know you will find someone to go with. Dennis, 14
You're in high school. Kids are always trying to fit in and one way kids try to fit in is by putting other things down. They did this because they were nervous your other friends would think differently of them. Brush it off; you can remain friends with them… just don't let it bother you. You seem to be a very good, person. Keep them in check and keep on trucking! Dan, 17
No, this has never happened to me but I do have a suggestion. One would be to try to point out how the Bible verses relate to the situations that we, as teenagers, go through. Also just because the youth members don’t like the Bible study, it doesn’t mean that they are not true Christians. They just have not been as touched by God as you have. I went through the same thing a while ago but then I went through a lot of searching and understanding and now the Bible studies are things I don’t mind as I once did. John, 16
Some people could very well be peer pressured by other friends; for example, a kid in boy scouts, I was picking up for meetings, said our troop "s______" and boy scouts "is for gays". Remember peer pressure could have caused this because their other friends might think Christian youth groups are stupid. Don't lose faith in them. Danny, 16
Well, I've never had something like that happen to me but your friends are probably still your friends. They are probably just saying that because other people might make fun of them for being in a youth group and they’re scared to be different. That's O.K. though. Eventually they will realize that being in a youth group is not a bad thing. Bianca, 16
Do you have some thoughts for Discouraged in Ohio regarding this matter? Please share them by e-mailing TimFerguson@christianyouthgroup.org. The young people will be notified. We will publish any responses given, which are supportive in nature. As a community of Christian youth let’s share helpful ideas and experiences with Discouraged in Ohio.